Question: Ever put your foot in your mouth?

So...as we all know, I'm usually the only minority in the various programs that I've done and I've never encountered any issue until coming here. I have a co-worker who is a Filipino male from Hawaii who manages to put his foot in his mouth every now and then. For example, we were all sitting around doing much of nothing in the office one day. Another co-worker draws really well so they had been playing a game that involves describing a person to the artistic guy and he would make a funny sketch based on what you say. So my Filipino co-worker started describing a man...when it came time to describe the man's clothes he says, "Make his clothes like a Black guy." I was reading quietly, and stopped to look up with a bewildered face because I was seriously wondering where this was going. I guess he sensed/saw me look up (I don't know which because I was staring off into the distance like huh), because in an effort to clean it up he says, "Like with a big jacket." So I turn to look at him and say, "Hmm, that's interesting because I don't own a big jacket. Neither do most of the Black guys I know." Realizing where I was coming from, he immediately apologized and continued to apologize throughout the day.

Well, tonight we all attended a get together and the play list that looped in the background happened to be on a hip hop song. Everyone was making general conversation and he says, "There's this one episode of South Park when Stan's dad is on a TV show and the category was 'Things that annoy you.' And the answer said 'N-blank-G-G-E-R-S' and he had to fill in the blank. So he says the N-word, but the answer is 'Naggers.' I was like whoa." Now, I don't know what in the world possessed him to share this story but the room fell silent and in an attempt to save him another guys says, "Hmmm. Let me think of the most outrageous thing I've ever heard on South Park" and he goes into his own account about one of the Christmas episodes. I choose my battles, so I decided to save my response for later when there wasn't a room full of people who didn't deserve to be made uncomfortable by whatever was bound to come out of my mouth. When I got home, I checked my email. Earlier in the day he had sent an email out to everyone about a dinner tomorrow. It was in response to an email one of the female teachers had sent out. I'm going to leave the names out...A line of it went as follows:

"You forgot to mention *******'s name ******. Bitch!"

I took this as an opportunity to :
1. Speak up for the woman he was talking to because she's too shy to confront people about things that offend her and she's expressed that to me on several occasions. I know this kind of language wouldn't be taken well, joke or not.
2. Speak up as a preemptive move to let him know that I don't take kindly to it either.
3. Tell him about the comment he'd made during dinner.

So I wrote him an email then went as follows:

Hey *****
Just a tip...be careful with that B word there...that can be taken the wrong way. And, I didn't want to bring it up at the dinner as to not create a weird vibe, but the South Park comment was a little...mmm...off...not sure where you were coming from/going with it. I'm not upset or harping, but it's always good to consider your company and/or who you're talking to...
See Ya Tomorrow

He's the type of person who has no problem admitting he's wrong so I didn't see the need to blast him. Here's his response over IM soon after I sent the email (he's red, I'm purple)

hey
howdy
just got back. read your email. Sorry, i didn't realize it until the end.
wasn't trying to diss you or anything like that
it's cool...didn't want the night to end without letting you know
yeah. thanks though
yep
i'll have to watch it next time
yeah
hope I didn't offend you
it's cool
if you're bored, check this out
http://www.spikedhumor.com/articles/89049/How_It_s_Made_Shoppin_Cart_Ep_212.html okie dokie
pretty cool eh?
o didn't check it yet....still checking backed up emails
well, i'm off to bed. Sorry about the comment tonight.
Good night
ok good night

When I checked my email, he had already sent me an email before he IMed. It read,
hey,
sorry about that. Didn't realize it until the end and by then it was too late. I wasn't trying to diss you or anything. I'm sorry.
*****

One of my Canadian co-workers has the tendency to use the phrase "You people." Let me tell you, the first time I heard it I was taken aback for like 2 seconds until I realized that she meant Americans...hahaha. On a not so funny note, her boyfriend's response to the fact that I didn't vote in the elections back in the fall was, "You need to vote. Especially you." I just looked at him like "What?" Another time, her boyfriend was making a joke online about how America is going to annex Canada. So I said, "Well if America does that then Mexico is next and I don't know that that will go over to well. Then there's the Caribbean." His response was, "Oh the Caribbean won't be a problem because 1. We're the backbone of their economy, 2. They don't have an army, and 3. They'd be late to their own insurgency." I looked at her and said, "WHAT! What is that supposed to mean?" She immediately replied, "Oh my God that was incredibly offensive," and I guess typed my reaction. I didn't need him to apologize and I'm assuming he didn't since she didn't say anything after that. From then I knew that I would not have anymore conversations with her concerning him. People need to do better.

There is another co-worker who says something racist everyday about several different ethnic groups (including whites) who considers himself a minority because he's homosexual. Sure, he may be a minority but I don't think that he realizes that people don't just automatically discriminate against him because they don't know he's a minority until he tells them about his sexual orientation. I've just resorted to looking at him crazy every time something ignorant comes out of his mouth. Just because you're a member of a marginalized group of people, it is certainly not okay to say derogatory things about others based on their race, sexuality, or whatever. I just hope that one day he get's a clue. Until then, I'll keep putting my foot down.